recognition
sometimes it feels like if I didn't exist no-one would notice. honestly, even my closest friends make me feel like this sometimes. That is when it hurts the most.
Take for example my work at college. I have battled very hard to be acknowledged as being part of this one committee all year. I have done a lot of work coordinating music for the committee, and trying different things..but the whole time, the leader did not acknowledge my participation.
Why am I so driven for acknowledgement? My purpose for getting things done and helping people, isn't for the personal gratification which comes from being publicly acknowledged. But I think there is a certain amount of respect that goes with being acknowledged. Why can't my friends thank me for doing things for them? Why can't they seek me out when I am not feeling the best? Why can't they see that I feel empty?
More importantly... who have I not acknowledged?
Life is so hard.
Take for example my work at college. I have battled very hard to be acknowledged as being part of this one committee all year. I have done a lot of work coordinating music for the committee, and trying different things..but the whole time, the leader did not acknowledge my participation.
Why am I so driven for acknowledgement? My purpose for getting things done and helping people, isn't for the personal gratification which comes from being publicly acknowledged. But I think there is a certain amount of respect that goes with being acknowledged. Why can't my friends thank me for doing things for them? Why can't they seek me out when I am not feeling the best? Why can't they see that I feel empty?
More importantly... who have I not acknowledged?
Life is so hard.
posted by amadeusthecreated at 7:27 PM
1 Comments:
the only way not to feel empty is to eat lots of chocolate!
then you can be fat and rip yourself off...
it's a sick cycle...lol
- mark
p.s. thnaks for the turkish delight...its GREATLY APPRIECHIATED.
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